Ask for feedback you can use
Ask for feedback you can use
Broad questions such as “How am I doing?” can produce vague answers. Ask about a recent behaviour in a defined setting instead. For example: “In our project meeting, what did I do that helped discussion, and what could I change?”
Listen without immediately defending your intention. Summarise what you heard and ask for an example if something is unclear. Choose one change you can practise, then revisit it after a few meetings. Feedback is most useful when it leads to an action that both people can recognise.
A workplace example
After a presentation, a team member says it was good. A question about which part helped them understand the decision will produce more useful information than a request for general praise.
Try this in practice
- Choose one recent interaction.
- Ask for one helpful behaviour and one change.
- Thank the person and test the suggested adjustment.
Who can give you a specific observation about your next meeting?
More on self-awareness
Keep reading
When something goes wrong, the first explanation that comes to mind may feel like a fact.
Self-awarenessSeparate intention from impactYou may intend to be efficient while a colleague experiences your short response as dismissive.
Self-awarenessBuild a daily emotional check-inBefore your first meeting, name the emotion you are bringing into the room.
